blackwire

On This Most Depressing Of Days...

On this most depressing of days, I made a stranger laugh...and felt pretty good.

On this most depressing of days, I saw a whole array of balloons and flowers and nice little trinkets and I thought to myself, "what absolute commercial thrash"; and yet, I smiled.

OTMDOD, I bought Faith and Chris a heart-shaped balloon each...just for the heck of it.

OTMDOD, I had a German vocab test...and it was horrendous.

OTMDOD, my dislike for someone grew, and my appreciation of someone else also grew.

OTMDOD, I watched the "Last King Of Scotland"...and thought that it was an incredibly intense show...but that's about it. I mean nothing in it pretty much surprises me, nothing much in it really touched me.

OTMDOD, my frustrations grabbed hold of my heart, and refused to let go.

OTMDOD, I realise that I hate, HAte, HATE, HATE.

OTMDOD, I lost it. For the first time in my life, I went crazy while driving. The music was so loud, it felt like my heart was beating in line with the bass. I screamed and screamed, and sped wherever I could, took 90 degree turns at 60km/h and the others at an even faster speeds. I lost control of myself.

OTMDOD, I drove for 10 seconds without my spectacles.

OTMDOD, I had a death wish. I could picture myself releasing the seat belt and braking so hard that I flew through the windscreen. I could also picture my car skidding into SOMETHING on one of the turns I took, crashing, and me walking out with blood all over, SMILING.

OTMDOD, I couldn't care less any more.

OTMDOD, I realised that there was something inexplicably exhilarating about all that.